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In other news... I slept on the kitchen floor (my bedroom is a very HOT room - not in a good way). I had the doors to the garden open. At one point before dawn, this happened - I WOKE UP TO FIND MYSELF FACE TO FACE WITH A FOX... (I may have to do more Miranda to do that scene)

I naively thought Twitter ‘abuse’ might’ve eased. It doesn’t bother me that someone says I deserve cancer coz I’m unfunny or look pregnant with weight gain. It’s the shock of how we treat each other.We all deserve & desire dignity so why do we forget to give that to fellow humans

So very sad. I once sent a letter to many actors as a budding (I mean desperate) comedy actor to ask for sponsorship for the Edinburgh Festival. Dame June replied. Fifteen years later when I met her she had all my letters and the notes of the show she sponsored. I cried then too.

It’s not just me that’s preparing for and accepting the second wave is it? I of course hope my sense of it’s inevitably is wrong. But I find it easier to imagine it’s going to happen and be pleasantly surprised than the other way around.

If anyone is on their own during lockdown then I declare that it is absolutely normal, and to be encouraged, when you find yourself talking to objects. I just said "thank you, you are really good at what you do" to a hoover.

Thanks for being happy that I am happy. People are very kind. How we met is a little twist in the book I hope you enjoy. Thanks again xx 💍❤️

Thank you friends. #10yearsofsuchfun

I continue to be astonished by the vitriol that still happens on twitter right now. I am ok with being misunderstood or not liked (it comes with the job) but that even at this time in our social history it’s happening I just find sad. Luckily love and kindness out lasts all. ❤️

Lest this helps anyone: I’ve put on 40 pounds. I want to lose it as I feel less me. And it’s vital to be audaciously free to be ourselves. But whilst I reside in a bigger body I will not feel shame.There are many complex reasons for weight gain and losing it can be hard for many.

In other news.... In the front garden a wasp nearly went up my front garden. Thank you. As you were.

In other news... I just inadvertently flashed a delivery driver (was wearing a towel and it fully dropped to the floor). You’re welcome for that image.

I am welling up regularly at the extraordinary messages from people saying what Miranda meant to them. Thank you all very much. Saturday marks 10 years. I have learnt many things in those 10 years and one is I am ‘allowed’ to be proud of and celebrate my show! #10yearsofsuchfun

I think it’s really important right now to remember there is love, goodness, kindness, truth and beauty in the world. It’s still there. It’s perhaps more hidden and not in the places we wish it was. But it always wins through in the end if we keep following it. 🧡

Fox update - I was lying in bed, upstairs this time, and I hear noise on the stairs. A brief moment of “there’s someone in the house and how can my dressing gown become a weapon”. Then I slowly go to the top of the stairs. The fox is half way up TO MY BEDROOM. UNACCEPTABLE.

I thought an insect had stung me inside my dressing gown. It was a piece of crispy kale from the night before. Classy. As you were.

I was doing a big poo and my Fitbit came on and said it detected I was going on a walk. As you were.

Happy Day to all those who have chosen to or haven’t been able to have children but nurture and cherish and mother in other ways. ❤️❤️

In other news... went into the garden. Yawned and stretched. As arms went up, the towel around my waist fell to the floor. Wasn’t wearing pants. Thank you.

Thank you for the lovely birthday wishes. I am 47 today. It feels like a good age. So I think I am going to be 47 for a while.

Woman on street: OMG is that dog Peggy? Me: Yes. Woman: Wow. She’s famous. I am reading her book. Me to self: HER book? Woman: She belongs to that actress, how come you are walking her? Me: Ummm.... I just get to walk her sometimes. *Woman stares and walks off suspicious*

I have had a cauliflower, kale and courgette soup for lunch. I declare my social distancing is now 200 metres.

Who else has switched off all their lights, is hiding and feeling threatened and unsettled when someone still knocks on the door? Hello to you my people!

I can’t change the world but I will say once more - however sad & angry we have the right to be when we see vile & damaging attacks on here, we must not, I believe, attack them back. It feels justified but it only promotes, fuels, is acting like them, and doesn’t make change.

In other news... I might have hit a low standards peak - I just wiped my hands on my dog after a meal as I couldn’t be bothered to get a tea towel...

I am in bra pants and a sarong. But the sarong can sense I don’t want it on and keeps escaping. And my pants are the ones I wore to play a square 1950’s Midwife. You’re welcome for that image.

1/2 I usually have a thick skin when it comes to being misunderstood in the press. Today it got to me. We are all in this thing together & I'm raising money for charities to support the chronically ill (which is why i experimented raising price on Cameo) Not coz I'm a posh bitch.

And finally. And let us all be kind and in this together. Don’t bully the bullies. No one is perfect. We all make mistakes and always will. RIP Caroline and I hope we do you proud by making some changes. X.

In other news... I had to go commando today due to a washing back up scenario. Felt good and free about it. Walked the dog. Passed a few people. Put trousers in wash. Noticed big hole in trousers. Brilliant.

It explains why I will be taking some time away after saying goodbye to my darling dog. Peggy - you were always by my side and always on my side and I will miss you everyday. X

In other news.... I dropped bolognaise on my dog.

I did this for Instagram as twitter doesn’t feel as jolly and kind a place to combine your love of clowning with your love of the self-love journey to wellbeing. But here it is! We are all a work in progress. We don’t need to get to a standard to reduce shame or start our life.🧡

Sending huge love to all my fellow ME sufferers and all those with chronic conditions. My book doesn’t just speak to that but that was my story, and I know that sadly there a millions who also suffer from similar. Big hopeful hug to you ❤️

I find one of my greatest introvert pleasures in the summer is not staying out because it’s light, and because ‘I should make the most of every summer evening’; but going to bed whilst it’s still light. Like a baby. Heaven.

For those not on Instagram (do come join the calmer party) this from last summer to brighten up the start of a new week. (Ps. My friend loves it and wants it to be shown. And I was holding another rope so canoe didn’t float away. Wasn’t just filming! But we are so glad I did!)

9th November 2019 marks 10 years of Miranda. Simply: Thank you for watching. Love oo. ❤️❤️❤️#10yearsofsuchfun

Oh Australia my heart breaks further this morning. More places that I have visited and loved and were important to me - all that beauty and wildlife - all gone. If I feel that I can but imagine the horror for those who live there. ❤️🇦🇺❤️🇦🇺❤️🇦🇺

Last 48 hours in UK:- “It’s getting warm” “Yay” *gets shorts, soleros, suncream* “It’s way too hot” “I’m going inside” *sweaty rage* “I can’t sleep, get out of the bed, you’re like a massive hot water bottle” “It’s cooling down tomorrow” “Ooh, feel that breeze” *pops kettle on*

Like galloping, running through sprinklers should not be an activity only socially acceptable for children. An adult should feel no shame in trotting through their own or someone else’s sprinkler privately or publicly.

I’ve had so many texts today from friends saying they are happy Miranda is back. Which is lovely. But it’s not (maybe one day). But this year we’re having a 10th birthday party celebration entertainment, not scripted sitcom special. I hope you will all still like it. Larks ahead

I so desperately want to live in a world where leaders are vulnerable. By vulnerable I mean open, human, free to apologise instead of covering up. People who know who they are, show us who they are and why they are leading. Not people stifled by or high and grasping on the power.

It would have been so easy for The Duchess at the end of this to stay strong publicly, brush it aside, pretend she was ok really but her “yes” shows the power and courage and strength of vulnerability. Respect.

Will do this at the curtain call of Annie tonight.

News balance as per previous tweet - here’s my friend trying to get out of a canoe....

In other news.... An advantage of weight gain is that the under bosom area can hold quite hefty items. It’s like having two natural pockets. You’re welcome. As you were.

In other news... there’s always a cup of tea. Always.

I am sure we will all have many personal Covid angels during this time. Today mine was two supermarket workers when I really needed the help. Thank you to all courageous, kind, hardworking key workers out there. ❤️❤️❤️

Would I Lie To You is the funniest programme on TV. That’s what I think.

In other news.... an afternoon bath is delightful. As you were. Back to being alert or at home or both.

In other news.. I’ve taken to whipping off my top with confidence & abandon like I envied men doing, when ‘normal society’ said women needed the right bra and stomach. It’s strange how a man’s belly was ‘allowed’ and less judged.I feel free. I love my currently white wobbly tummy

To see grown men & women, professionals, journalists, shouting at people or a tweet they don’t like, when they dish it - it’s worrying. That those in positions of power are so fragile they’re affected. Or enjoy combat. Put your guns down, stop to see what you’re doing & feeling x

In other news.... I just made a passing dog jump with an unexpected fart for both of us. (I feel it was one of my greatest achievements. And your welcome as regards me sharing it.)

It’s time for the yearly showing of THE CANOE VIDEO! We STILL laugh about it. Enjoy.

I wonder how many people are already regretting their new gym membership as they force themselves to go tomorrow? If you hate it (and haven’t signed a 34 year contract) just go for nice brisk walks instead. Gyms smell of crotch. If you love it. Brill.

I’m all for finding the light in the darkness & the such fun in each day despite. But with no vaccine for a virus still very much present, to name but one obvious issue, I don’t think having a pint and a haircut is a SUPER Saturday. But it seems the excitement is umm, infectious.

Thanks for all the lovely comments about The Final Curtain ep and thanks for watching generally. Means an awful lot. Au revoir.

In other news.... My increased upper circumference means I have a clearly defined breast shelf on which to place a phone for calls. As you were.

Just had a very middle aged moment - I looked at my to do list and one entry was Fencing. No clue what it meant. I wondered if I had forgotten that I’d decided to take fencing up as a sport. I considered that for quite a while before remembering I have a wonky garden trellis.

It has been a very very tough week for those affected by news in the TV industry, by the effects of bullying, by the many living with invisible illness who are daily misunderstood & by the reality of unkindness & indecency to each other. Changes will be made. No choice but to.❤️

I really struggle when the leader of our country, at a time we need foremost, clarity - clearly defined rules as millions suffer- turns vaguely to one side in a press conference to say “6 inside & as I understand it not 6 outside” You really should understand it and make it clear

Enjoy your day of “wasn’t it a lovely extra hour” “can you BELIEVE how dark it is now” “it’s really 10 not 11 isn’t that nice. Or is it the other way around. How does it work again?” “Every year I get confused, what am I like?” “Has my phone updated or am I late. Or is early?”

You know you have put on weight when you stand up about an hour after eating a tangerine and a segment drops off you from an unknown crevice...

Oh wow. Tears all around.

Thinking of all the marathon runners today. I have got a sweat on unloading the dishwasher.

In other news… I realise cleaning and organising the house is basically picking an item up and putting it in another place.

Although I find weight loss/gain one of the most boring subjects in the history of subjects, I think the reason people keep saying I’ve lost weight when the opposite is true, is because I no longer wear skinny jeans.Middle aged advice.(Also, wear what you want, who gives a shit!)

And.... cannot stop crying... so beautiful

Good example - I eat boringly healthily and don’t drink. Not a single bit of sugar has passed my lips in a long time except for the odd bit of dark chocolate. Being bigger doesn’t mean people are scoffing their faces. And if weight gain is caused by that - still no shame.

I just trod on an olive. In bare feet. Fright of my life. As you were.

The whole 5 mins of this video on chronic illness on my insta or FB page. It would mean a lot to me if you listened. It’s an important time to raise awareness for all those living with chronic illness as their personal lockdown will continue long after the global one lifts.